As parents, we send our children off to school with a few tears and a few more worries. Will they succeed academically? Will they make friends? Will they choose the right kind of friends? Will they avoid the pitfalls of youth? If there are special needs, will the school manage the IEP adequately to help our children overcome the obstacles they face?
I don’t know about you but how other children would treat my girls never entered my head. My girls are nice girls, what is there not to like? As behind the scenes reports of the insidious shooting sprees at Columbine High School and Virginia Tech University over the last decade described the perpetrators as “loners,” students who had been at the mercy of teasing and ridicule, I never dreamed that my children could also be victims of school bullying. I don’t know why I didn’t think that through. After all, I was teased as a child about my thick glasses, teasing demeaning enough to have a lasting impact on me. I figured schools’ attitudes had changed over the last twenty years and the policy of “handle it yourself and don’t tattle” was archaic and obsolete.
Schools have become more tough on bullying, reaching a zero tolerance policy. Yet teasing, bullying and ridicule still happens. Next week, I hope to share an interview with a local school official whom I’m confident will give some terrific insight into why bullying happens and what the schools are doing about it.
I’m finding out I’m not the only parent who can be clueless as to what is happening at school or on the playground. Here are some things a parent can do to discover if their child is the object of school bullying.
1. Listen and take seriously when your child complains of unfair treatment from a fellow classmate. While the lone incident may seem minor, your child may be sending out a test line to see how you react. Ask if this has happened before. Ask if the other child is usually his friend. Ask how the other child treats other children. Don’t be timid to contact the teacher and ask the teacher to observe interactions between your child and the other child for a few days.
2. Look for warning signs. Is your child withdrawing? Is there a major shift in behavior? This should have been our warning sign. When we moved from Kansas to North Carolina, my happy-go-lucky daughter suddenly became reserved and somber. I thought it was just the difficulty of moving from a small rural school to a large multicultural urban school. Only years later did I find out bullying was happening as well.
Is your child hesitant to be involved with other children? Is your child aggressive and “bullying” others himself? This actually may be a rebound from bullying he has received; as a child, he doesn’t have the coping skills to know how to respond, so he lashes out.
3. Be aware of potential bullying triggers. If your child moves to a new school, he or she will be more of a target, simply because they are new. My daughter was picked on in fifth grade because she attended a school in a rich neighborhood and didn’t wear the latest fashions. If your child has no friends, bullying may be more likely to occur because your child is seen as a social outcast. If your child is different in any way – handicap, social/economic status, a child of integrity or one who doesn’t cuss like the other kids – bullying and teasing is more likely to occur.
I hope to share with you next week from my interview what parents can do to help their child not be a victim of bullying. I also want to share how you can work with the school your child attends to stop the bullying.
Each child is precious in the sight of God. Each of us, our children included, are made in the image of God. Everyone, no matter who they are, deserves to be treated with kindness and respect. Let’s teach our children to lift others up instead of tearing them down. Yet we live in a fallen world where there will always be nasty people in our lives. Let’s also help our children kept their eyes on Jesus for, after all, Jesus’ opinion of them is the only one that counts.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Childhood Bullies: Part One
What will get me steamed more than anything else Inside the Classroom? When I see a bully in action. When I hear kids tease each other. When I hear kids ridicule another’s opinion, abilities, decisions or interests. When kids in my high school class recently made fun of a boy for dropping out of college on his first day, I felt sick to my stomach. He was humiliated enough – why did they have to rub it in? How awful to be branded as a loser! If a kid dares to say something derogatory about another kid in my class, very quickly, he is very sorry he bothered to open his mouth. I’m so glad to see school instilling zero tolerance policies for bullying. Gone are the days, I hope, that most teachers scold the victim for being a tattletale, tell them to settle it themselves, then turn their backs. A zero tolerance policy has been needed for a long time.
I know how it feels. I was the kid who got picked last for class ball teams. I was called “ugly” and “four eyes.” Because of my Coke-bottle bottom glasses, I was given the distinct impression that no boy would ever want to go out with me.
Kids can be cruel. And, in spite of how much we say kids are resilient, those kind of wounds last a lifetime – unless God heals them. I’ll talk about how God healed me in another post. Have you noticed that we don’t hear the adage, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” anymore? It was a nice cover up to smart back to the bullies because under no circumstances did we want to appear weak and let the bully know how much it really did hurt.
Yet, with experience, I’ve also realized that being a bully doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Bullies aren’t bullies just because they are made to be mean. A kid has the drive to bully others because he or she needs to feel superior – perhaps because he or she feels inferior in another venue of life. The slogan I’ve come to appreciate is this: “hurting people hurt others.”
I want to look at this topic from several different perspectives over the next few posts. I want to suggest classroom management for handling the bully in your class. I want to suggest ways to help the victim cope. And I want to discuss how children’s ministry workers can teach respect and kindness as a way of preventing the careless insensitive comments kids make to each other. While we’re in the middle of this series, I would appreciate your comments and feedback. How do you discipline a bully? How do you help the victim? How do you keep a victim from becoming a bully himself? What curriculum have you used to teach respect for others? How have you dug to the root issue in a bully’s life? Email me your input at karenawingate@gmail.com.
I know how it feels. I was the kid who got picked last for class ball teams. I was called “ugly” and “four eyes.” Because of my Coke-bottle bottom glasses, I was given the distinct impression that no boy would ever want to go out with me.
Kids can be cruel. And, in spite of how much we say kids are resilient, those kind of wounds last a lifetime – unless God heals them. I’ll talk about how God healed me in another post. Have you noticed that we don’t hear the adage, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” anymore? It was a nice cover up to smart back to the bullies because under no circumstances did we want to appear weak and let the bully know how much it really did hurt.
Yet, with experience, I’ve also realized that being a bully doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Bullies aren’t bullies just because they are made to be mean. A kid has the drive to bully others because he or she needs to feel superior – perhaps because he or she feels inferior in another venue of life. The slogan I’ve come to appreciate is this: “hurting people hurt others.”
I want to look at this topic from several different perspectives over the next few posts. I want to suggest classroom management for handling the bully in your class. I want to suggest ways to help the victim cope. And I want to discuss how children’s ministry workers can teach respect and kindness as a way of preventing the careless insensitive comments kids make to each other. While we’re in the middle of this series, I would appreciate your comments and feedback. How do you discipline a bully? How do you help the victim? How do you keep a victim from becoming a bully himself? What curriculum have you used to teach respect for others? How have you dug to the root issue in a bully’s life? Email me your input at karenawingate@gmail.com.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Children's Ministry and Discouragement
"Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." - 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NIV)
He was always getting into fights at school. Sunday School lessons on kindness and forgiveness were beyond him. “It’s not right to hit others,” we told him. “He started it,” was always his excuse. Slowly, we saw his heart soften. He began asking more questions about Jesus. We saw him on the brink of making a decision for Christ, then he backed off. “I’m not ready,” he said. “He’s not ready,” he said. Soon after, the boy moved to Florida to live with his dad. Surprisingly, the grandmother told me, his was thriving and doing well. Still, I felt my co-workers and I had failed. We had not seen him through to a saving knowledge of Jesus.
"Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. – 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NKJV)"
They came with two car loads of street kids, kids from broken homes, kids with hard exteriors, kids who didn’t even know their hearts were broken. One came to the Lord yet was stubborn to change his way of life. The others thought church was a game, a time to text message each other, eat food, throw pillows and sit next to girl friends in my Sunday School class. After a year, the youth leaders left, taking both car loads of kids with them. I felt I had failed. Did anything I taught them manage to stick to their souls?
"So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless. – 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NLT)"
Last night, Bill O’Riley, on The O’Riley Factor, quoted James Dobson, former CEO of Focus on the Family, who said, regarding the culture wars on the American family,“"We are awash in evil and the battle is still to be waged. We are right now in the most discouraging period of that long conflict (quoted from the Washington Monthly). Humanly speaking, we can say we have lost all those battles." O’Riley respectfully disagreed – there are still many in America who hold traditional values, he said. I add another reason why the battle is not lost:
"Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. - 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NIV)"
As Children’s Ministry workers, we never know how long we will be blessed by the presence of one child. They may come one week, never to darken our door again. They may come sporadically, or come faithfully for several years, only, one day, to come no more. Each session, we stand firm on the truth of God’s word. Each week, we give ourselves fully to the work God has given us to do. Each time, we stay faithful to God’s calling, confident that God will make sure, even if we never know, that our work will not be pointless. In ways only He can orchestrate, God will print our words to the pages of the lives around us and use our words and deeds to someday convict others of their need for the Savior.
I like Dobson’s conclusion which O'Reilly failed to pick up on: : “ . . . but God is in control and we are not going to give up now, right?”
Right.
He was always getting into fights at school. Sunday School lessons on kindness and forgiveness were beyond him. “It’s not right to hit others,” we told him. “He started it,” was always his excuse. Slowly, we saw his heart soften. He began asking more questions about Jesus. We saw him on the brink of making a decision for Christ, then he backed off. “I’m not ready,” he said. “He’s not ready,” he said. Soon after, the boy moved to Florida to live with his dad. Surprisingly, the grandmother told me, his was thriving and doing well. Still, I felt my co-workers and I had failed. We had not seen him through to a saving knowledge of Jesus.
"Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. – 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NKJV)"
They came with two car loads of street kids, kids from broken homes, kids with hard exteriors, kids who didn’t even know their hearts were broken. One came to the Lord yet was stubborn to change his way of life. The others thought church was a game, a time to text message each other, eat food, throw pillows and sit next to girl friends in my Sunday School class. After a year, the youth leaders left, taking both car loads of kids with them. I felt I had failed. Did anything I taught them manage to stick to their souls?
"So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless. – 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NLT)"
Last night, Bill O’Riley, on The O’Riley Factor, quoted James Dobson, former CEO of Focus on the Family, who said, regarding the culture wars on the American family,“"We are awash in evil and the battle is still to be waged. We are right now in the most discouraging period of that long conflict (quoted from the Washington Monthly). Humanly speaking, we can say we have lost all those battles." O’Riley respectfully disagreed – there are still many in America who hold traditional values, he said. I add another reason why the battle is not lost:
"Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. - 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NIV)"
As Children’s Ministry workers, we never know how long we will be blessed by the presence of one child. They may come one week, never to darken our door again. They may come sporadically, or come faithfully for several years, only, one day, to come no more. Each session, we stand firm on the truth of God’s word. Each week, we give ourselves fully to the work God has given us to do. Each time, we stay faithful to God’s calling, confident that God will make sure, even if we never know, that our work will not be pointless. In ways only He can orchestrate, God will print our words to the pages of the lives around us and use our words and deeds to someday convict others of their need for the Savior.
I like Dobson’s conclusion which O'Reilly failed to pick up on: : “ . . . but God is in control and we are not going to give up now, right?”
Right.
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Creative Classroom Expressions About Easter
April 5, 2009
I’m a big proponent of interactive learning, where the teacher gets the students involved in the learning process. It’s the kind of learning my 4-H motto from years ago described as “Learn by Doing.” Long gone are the days where kids sit dutifully before a teacher who spoke words of wisdom, confident something was oozing into the little brains between the wiggles. Now, kids actively participate in hands on learning and discovery.
I’m learning to become an interactive teacher. It would be so easy to study my lesson and let the words of the curriculum ooze into the pores of my tired brain so I could then repeat them by rote to my dutiful students. I’m a better teacher when I practice what I preach and learn to do something in my own life with the material I’m teaching.
Today, I decided to give my junior church students an overview of the week before Jesus’ Resurrection. We wrote out the days of the week from Sunday to Sunday, then lay them on the floor. We stepped on each paper and talked about what happened on each day of Holy Week. We played a game so we could name ways to praise God for Palm Sunday. I gave them each a journal for this week, so each day, they could draw pictures or write about their responses to this special week. Then we started the project I spoke of several weeks ago in this column. We started to create art work of things in this world that remind us of Christ’s Resurrection.
I came home pondering what I had taught. How would I express my wonder at the miracle of this Holy Week? I’m by no means an artist so I won’t drive anyone to tears of frustration over my feeble artistic attempts. I don’t claim to be a very good poet either, but I do want to share with you my creative expression of how I feel about this week.
###
HOLY WEEK
On Sunday, they sang;
On Monday, they swang
To a different opinion of Jesus,
The one to redeem them from their sin.
For two days, He taught;
For two days, they sought
To find a way they could still
The voice of salvation to all men.
On Thursday, He broke the bread;
On Friday, He broke His body,
So his blood could remove
The stain of our errant ways.
On Friday, He died;
On Saturday, his disciples cried
So wretchedly for the one
They thought would restore their land.
On Sunday, He rose;
From then on, they chose
Whether to believe the gift of Love
Enabling them to stand
Before God, spotless and pure
For the rest of their days
And Eternity.
###
Now it’s your turn. How can you express your reaction to what Jesus did for you during this Holy Week?
Have a blessed week!
April 5, 2009
I’m a big proponent of interactive learning, where the teacher gets the students involved in the learning process. It’s the kind of learning my 4-H motto from years ago described as “Learn by Doing.” Long gone are the days where kids sit dutifully before a teacher who spoke words of wisdom, confident something was oozing into the little brains between the wiggles. Now, kids actively participate in hands on learning and discovery.
I’m learning to become an interactive teacher. It would be so easy to study my lesson and let the words of the curriculum ooze into the pores of my tired brain so I could then repeat them by rote to my dutiful students. I’m a better teacher when I practice what I preach and learn to do something in my own life with the material I’m teaching.
Today, I decided to give my junior church students an overview of the week before Jesus’ Resurrection. We wrote out the days of the week from Sunday to Sunday, then lay them on the floor. We stepped on each paper and talked about what happened on each day of Holy Week. We played a game so we could name ways to praise God for Palm Sunday. I gave them each a journal for this week, so each day, they could draw pictures or write about their responses to this special week. Then we started the project I spoke of several weeks ago in this column. We started to create art work of things in this world that remind us of Christ’s Resurrection.
I came home pondering what I had taught. How would I express my wonder at the miracle of this Holy Week? I’m by no means an artist so I won’t drive anyone to tears of frustration over my feeble artistic attempts. I don’t claim to be a very good poet either, but I do want to share with you my creative expression of how I feel about this week.
###
HOLY WEEK
On Sunday, they sang;
On Monday, they swang
To a different opinion of Jesus,
The one to redeem them from their sin.
For two days, He taught;
For two days, they sought
To find a way they could still
The voice of salvation to all men.
On Thursday, He broke the bread;
On Friday, He broke His body,
So his blood could remove
The stain of our errant ways.
On Friday, He died;
On Saturday, his disciples cried
So wretchedly for the one
They thought would restore their land.
On Sunday, He rose;
From then on, they chose
Whether to believe the gift of Love
Enabling them to stand
Before God, spotless and pure
For the rest of their days
And Eternity.
###
Now it’s your turn. How can you express your reaction to what Jesus did for you during this Holy Week?
Have a blessed week!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Let The Children Run
As my husband and I were returning from Arizona after my grandfather’s memorial service, we had a two-hour layover in Phoenix before the next leg of our journey. Knowing we would be sitting for the next four hours, we struck out for a brisk walk along the concourses. Trailing the moving sidewalk, we saw a dark haired boy who must have not been a day over three-years-old running along the moving sidewalk, his mom laden with baggage slowly ambling behind. He was running as hard and as fast as he could! I involuntarily sucked in my breath when he reached the end of the sidewalk, knowing how I always catch myself as the movement disappears into a solid step. Not this kid. He leaped over the edge, threw his hands in the air, and shouted, “Yaaaayyy!”
I commented to my husband, “Wouldn’t it be nice if the most exciting thing in your life right now was running along a moving sidewalk at an airport?’ I guess I was in a nostalgic mood anyway. I had spent the week with family, getting teary over family pictures, reminiscing about my grandfather and the precious moments we had shared over the years and enjoying multiple meals of food and memories as we did what our family always did – ate too much at our favorite Mexican restaurants.
Still, that little boy’s exuberance was the perfect exclamation point to the paragraph about life God had been teaching me all week. Enjoy the simple pleasures. Grasp each moment and celebrate. Run the journey with purpose yet abandon, then throw your arms up in a victory salute at the end of the sidewalk.
That wonderful mom taught me something too. I remember when my girls were little and we lived in a tiny, isolated town in Kansas, we had to drive an hour just to get anything more than basic groceries. One day, we took them to the mall and let them ride the escalators up and down because the girls were bursting with energy from begin cooped up in the car. Someone, maybe an employee, scolded me for allowing the girls to ride the escalators without purpose and without me right beside them. “They might get hurt.”
Yeah, well, so they might. So might that little boy running on that moving sidewalk. So might I when I take risks through my life. But that wise mom, knowing her child was going to be cooped up in an unrelenting airplane all too soon, wisely let him take the risk, confident that she was close enough to be there should he fall yet far enough away to let him be free to run, to fall and to learn to not fall again.
We need to savor the simple moments, relish our relationships and run the risk of falling and failing, confident that the painful moments, though unpleasant, will teach us and equip us on how to handle the next moment of life.
I commented to my husband, “Wouldn’t it be nice if the most exciting thing in your life right now was running along a moving sidewalk at an airport?’ I guess I was in a nostalgic mood anyway. I had spent the week with family, getting teary over family pictures, reminiscing about my grandfather and the precious moments we had shared over the years and enjoying multiple meals of food and memories as we did what our family always did – ate too much at our favorite Mexican restaurants.
Still, that little boy’s exuberance was the perfect exclamation point to the paragraph about life God had been teaching me all week. Enjoy the simple pleasures. Grasp each moment and celebrate. Run the journey with purpose yet abandon, then throw your arms up in a victory salute at the end of the sidewalk.
That wonderful mom taught me something too. I remember when my girls were little and we lived in a tiny, isolated town in Kansas, we had to drive an hour just to get anything more than basic groceries. One day, we took them to the mall and let them ride the escalators up and down because the girls were bursting with energy from begin cooped up in the car. Someone, maybe an employee, scolded me for allowing the girls to ride the escalators without purpose and without me right beside them. “They might get hurt.”
Yeah, well, so they might. So might that little boy running on that moving sidewalk. So might I when I take risks through my life. But that wise mom, knowing her child was going to be cooped up in an unrelenting airplane all too soon, wisely let him take the risk, confident that she was close enough to be there should he fall yet far enough away to let him be free to run, to fall and to learn to not fall again.
We need to savor the simple moments, relish our relationships and run the risk of falling and failing, confident that the painful moments, though unpleasant, will teach us and equip us on how to handle the next moment of life.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Karen Wingate's Current Projects
Grab a cup of your favorite brew and let’s do some catch-up. Let me fill you in on what I am currently doing in Children’s Ministry and in curriculum writing.
Right now, I’m taking a much needed indefinite sabbatical from teaching Sunday School. It’s been at least six years since I have had a break and I am already appreciating the chance to recharge my spiritual batteries. I’m still teaching in our children’s church program. We’ve done something different the last few months. Using Standard Publishing’s Anytime VBS program, we’ve spread each lesson over two Sundays. Each Sunday we tell the story in a different way. The first Sunday we have games and activities to reinforce the lesson. The second Sunday, we bring in a lady who does a craft with the kids. Our program has grown; last week, we had eleven children! We’re hoping to use this approach again by purchasing one or more VBS starter kits now available then use them throughout the year.
At this time, I’m writing Vacation Bible School material for Standard Publishing’s 2010 cycle. What’s the theme? I can’t tell you but I will tell you that I’m excited about the 2009 Standard VBS called Studio Go! Based on the theme of a game show environment, this game packed material is great for your more active, kinesthetic learners. I like using games in my teaching so I think it’s a great program.
Also, be watching for my three books published by Rainbow Publishing in 2010., three additions to the “Five Minute Sunday School Activities” series. If you need some quick lessons that take little time to prepare, these are the books for you.
I’m at a point in my life where I am moving away from writing curriculum. Two weeks ago, I attended the Florida Christian Writer’s Conference and had the opportunity to speak with several editors. I’m working on rewriting the first three chapters of a novel to then submit to several agents. I also have some writing to do for several magazines and hope to pitch a book idea on leadership to a publishing company soon.
On a personal note: Heaven has gained a wonderful believer in Christ and we have lost a dear member of our family. My 97-year-old grandfather who was, in many respects, a father figure for me, went to be with the Lord this past week. Our family will be gathering in Arizona for his memorial service, so it may be a couple of weeks before I am able to post to this column again.
Until then, keep teaching the children and continue to let them teach you. And keep the coffe can and tea bags handy!
Right now, I’m taking a much needed indefinite sabbatical from teaching Sunday School. It’s been at least six years since I have had a break and I am already appreciating the chance to recharge my spiritual batteries. I’m still teaching in our children’s church program. We’ve done something different the last few months. Using Standard Publishing’s Anytime VBS program, we’ve spread each lesson over two Sundays. Each Sunday we tell the story in a different way. The first Sunday we have games and activities to reinforce the lesson. The second Sunday, we bring in a lady who does a craft with the kids. Our program has grown; last week, we had eleven children! We’re hoping to use this approach again by purchasing one or more VBS starter kits now available then use them throughout the year.
At this time, I’m writing Vacation Bible School material for Standard Publishing’s 2010 cycle. What’s the theme? I can’t tell you but I will tell you that I’m excited about the 2009 Standard VBS called Studio Go! Based on the theme of a game show environment, this game packed material is great for your more active, kinesthetic learners. I like using games in my teaching so I think it’s a great program.
Also, be watching for my three books published by Rainbow Publishing in 2010., three additions to the “Five Minute Sunday School Activities” series. If you need some quick lessons that take little time to prepare, these are the books for you.
I’m at a point in my life where I am moving away from writing curriculum. Two weeks ago, I attended the Florida Christian Writer’s Conference and had the opportunity to speak with several editors. I’m working on rewriting the first three chapters of a novel to then submit to several agents. I also have some writing to do for several magazines and hope to pitch a book idea on leadership to a publishing company soon.
On a personal note: Heaven has gained a wonderful believer in Christ and we have lost a dear member of our family. My 97-year-old grandfather who was, in many respects, a father figure for me, went to be with the Lord this past week. Our family will be gathering in Arizona for his memorial service, so it may be a couple of weeks before I am able to post to this column again.
Until then, keep teaching the children and continue to let them teach you. And keep the coffe can and tea bags handy!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Easter Activity: Art Exhibit
Have you ever noticed that the creative people who get the most attention in the church are those who can sing, speak or play a musical instrument? What about those Christians who have been gifted with the ability to move their bodies in expressive ways, who sculpt or use paint to glorify their Redeemer? Are they any less “Christian” than the one who can act or sing?
My friend, LeAnne Martin, has opened my eyes to the need to promote art in the church. She has a wonderful blog, Christians in the Arts, that promotes and highlights Christians who dedicate their lives to art and beauty. The local church, particularly Children’s Ministry, needs to provide outlets for those who are gifted in the visual arts.
Because of my own lack in the visual arts, I've come to truly appreciate those who are gifted in the arts. I still remember how a sculpture in an Austrian monestary of Jesus washing the feet of Peter tugged at my heart and taught me a deeper lesson about service. We need to provice those whom God has gifted an outlet to be able to express their faith through their art. In return, the rest of us will blessed as we are drawn to worship God on a new level.
For this reason, our local congregation is holding an art exhibit for Easter. We’ve challenged our members, both children and adults, to think how they might creatively portray their impressions of the Resurrection. We’ve entitled the exhibit, “Reminders of the Resurrection” and we are using 2 Corinthians 5:17 as our key verse.
We’ve invited people to submit paintings, sculpture, photography, poems and essays. We’ll put the works in the church foyer on Easter morning for the rest of the congregation to see and to worship God through the medium of art.
I plan to work with the children the first two Sundays in April. We’ll talk about reminders of the Resurrection so the children will have a concrete understanding of what we are talking about. We’ll help them sketch their ideas on paper, then provide them with watercolors and “good” paper for them to finalize their creation. I’m excited to see what they come up with. I hope, I hope this project works so that our congregation can rejoice in the Resurrection that morning through the music of the choir and through the art work of the children and others.
What are some ways you’ve encouraged worship through the arts in your congregation? Share your comments below or email me at karenawingate@gmail.com. I’ll share your ideas in a future post.
My friend, LeAnne Martin, has opened my eyes to the need to promote art in the church. She has a wonderful blog, Christians in the Arts, that promotes and highlights Christians who dedicate their lives to art and beauty. The local church, particularly Children’s Ministry, needs to provide outlets for those who are gifted in the visual arts.
Because of my own lack in the visual arts, I've come to truly appreciate those who are gifted in the arts. I still remember how a sculpture in an Austrian monestary of Jesus washing the feet of Peter tugged at my heart and taught me a deeper lesson about service. We need to provice those whom God has gifted an outlet to be able to express their faith through their art. In return, the rest of us will blessed as we are drawn to worship God on a new level.
For this reason, our local congregation is holding an art exhibit for Easter. We’ve challenged our members, both children and adults, to think how they might creatively portray their impressions of the Resurrection. We’ve entitled the exhibit, “Reminders of the Resurrection” and we are using 2 Corinthians 5:17 as our key verse.
We’ve invited people to submit paintings, sculpture, photography, poems and essays. We’ll put the works in the church foyer on Easter morning for the rest of the congregation to see and to worship God through the medium of art.
I plan to work with the children the first two Sundays in April. We’ll talk about reminders of the Resurrection so the children will have a concrete understanding of what we are talking about. We’ll help them sketch their ideas on paper, then provide them with watercolors and “good” paper for them to finalize their creation. I’m excited to see what they come up with. I hope, I hope this project works so that our congregation can rejoice in the Resurrection that morning through the music of the choir and through the art work of the children and others.
What are some ways you’ve encouraged worship through the arts in your congregation? Share your comments below or email me at karenawingate@gmail.com. I’ll share your ideas in a future post.
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
Teaching Children Not To Fear
My reading list this month includes Bill O’Reilly’s book, A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity. Now, before you label me as one of those screaming fanatical conservatives, hear me through. First of all, O’Reilly labels himself as an independent, one who chooses to be a free thinker. From reading his book, I would certainly agree with that. Also, O’Reilly’s book covers far more than his views on politics. He emphasizes our need to embrace self reliance, independent thinking and hard work.
In one chapter, he discusses our need to overcome fear. Many people don’t progress in life, he says, because of one simple obstacle – fear. Courage is not the absence of fear but the willingness to walk through our fear, to not allow it to stop us from achieving what we want to accomplish in life.
A generation ago, says a Family Life survey, children were afraid of such things as the dark, strangers, high places and loud noises. Today, says the same report, our kids are afraid of death, divorce, terrorism, war and disease. This second survey was taken around the time of 9/11. I can imagine that, today, children would add something about the economic crisis.
How can we help our children overcome fear? We need to show our children ways to constructively fight back at their fears, to teach them that they are not helpless. As Christian educators, we need to introduce them to the Father who can be depended on to be with them and who will protect them from whatever happens.
One final way we can help our children not be afraid is to look at our own lives, acknowledge our fears and learn to walk through those fears. Look at the lists again. How many of the fears on the most recent list do kids really understand? Divorce, yes. Disease, maybe if they’ve seen it up closes and personal. War? Not in our country. Many of these fears we project onto our kids. We’re afraid. We talk about the uncertainty so our kids pick it up too and parrot our fears. We can help our children overcome fear by determining to not let fear take hold of us.
Recently I attended a conference several states away. I knew no one at this conference. Before I had a breakthrough eye surgery that tripled my vision, I always used Special Assistance when traveling by myself. This time, since I’m not legally blind anymore, I decided I really didn’t have a good reason to ask for it, so I decided to go solo. On the other hand, I have never traveled by myself before. I’m amused at the number of people back home that were surprised that I traveled alone without asking for help to a conference where I knew no one. Some people would be too afraid to be that adventuresome. Why not? The only way that I could achieve the benefits of what turned out to be a wonderful experience was to walk through my fear and not let it stop me. I think Bill O’Reilly would be proud of me.
Our children will learn to overcome fear when they watch us not allow the scary times to overtake us. If we teach them to overcome the fear of falling off a bike by saying after the first fall, “Get back up and try again,” we need to remind ourselves to do the same with our own fears.
In one chapter, he discusses our need to overcome fear. Many people don’t progress in life, he says, because of one simple obstacle – fear. Courage is not the absence of fear but the willingness to walk through our fear, to not allow it to stop us from achieving what we want to accomplish in life.
A generation ago, says a Family Life survey, children were afraid of such things as the dark, strangers, high places and loud noises. Today, says the same report, our kids are afraid of death, divorce, terrorism, war and disease. This second survey was taken around the time of 9/11. I can imagine that, today, children would add something about the economic crisis.
How can we help our children overcome fear? We need to show our children ways to constructively fight back at their fears, to teach them that they are not helpless. As Christian educators, we need to introduce them to the Father who can be depended on to be with them and who will protect them from whatever happens.
One final way we can help our children not be afraid is to look at our own lives, acknowledge our fears and learn to walk through those fears. Look at the lists again. How many of the fears on the most recent list do kids really understand? Divorce, yes. Disease, maybe if they’ve seen it up closes and personal. War? Not in our country. Many of these fears we project onto our kids. We’re afraid. We talk about the uncertainty so our kids pick it up too and parrot our fears. We can help our children overcome fear by determining to not let fear take hold of us.
Recently I attended a conference several states away. I knew no one at this conference. Before I had a breakthrough eye surgery that tripled my vision, I always used Special Assistance when traveling by myself. This time, since I’m not legally blind anymore, I decided I really didn’t have a good reason to ask for it, so I decided to go solo. On the other hand, I have never traveled by myself before. I’m amused at the number of people back home that were surprised that I traveled alone without asking for help to a conference where I knew no one. Some people would be too afraid to be that adventuresome. Why not? The only way that I could achieve the benefits of what turned out to be a wonderful experience was to walk through my fear and not let it stop me. I think Bill O’Reilly would be proud of me.
Our children will learn to overcome fear when they watch us not allow the scary times to overtake us. If we teach them to overcome the fear of falling off a bike by saying after the first fall, “Get back up and try again,” we need to remind ourselves to do the same with our own fears.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Teaching Children Wisdom
Recently, I was teaching a lesson to my Junior church students on the commitment of John the Baptist to forego everything else in order to proclaim the message about the coming Messiah. “How do you put Jesus first?” I asked my group. I was expecting answers like “Be honest when others aren’t,” “Watch movies that aren’t violent or that put Jesus down,” or “Be kind and reach out to other kids who are being left out.”
Instead, my group answered with the three following answers: “Pray,” “Go to Church,” and “Read the Bible.”
I felt frustrated . How could I ask the question so they saw that following Jesus is a 24/7 venture, that our faith is not just some basic rules that allow us to barely slip into Heaven? I probed. “What more do you need to do than just read the Bible?” They stared at me. Finally one child answered tentatively, “Think about what you are reading?” That was a start, at least!
“What about doing what the Bible says?” I asked. “What does the Bible tell us to do?” More blank stares. I gave the answers I listed above. I’m not sure they got it. What’s wrong with these kids that they don’t understand that what we are teaching them is to be applied to their every day life? I wondered. I was more frustrated than ever. But I shouldn’t have been.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Gene, a fellow worker on my mission trip to Austria last spring told me to emphasize the word, “beginning.” Our job as teachers is to move kids beyond the beginning point of wisdom. The beginning of wisdom is knowledge of Jesus. That’s the point my group of students were at. Wisdom is knowing the difference between right and wrong. The greatest form of wisdom, says Gene, is to take what you know and apply it to everyday life.
Teaching children about Jesus is a progression. It doesn’t happen all at once. We first teach who God is, who Jesus is and that we are to honor Him as our Lord. But we don’t stop there, assuming the kids will figure out the rest. We must continue to guide them in gaining wisdom by giving them example after example of how to take what you know and apply it to everyday life.
That’s extra work. That takes some thinking and creativity and lots of prayer for . . . wisdom. Whoever said teaching was easy?
We can’t presume kids will make the connection between knowledge and life application, biblically known as wisdom. Sometimes we have to spell it out, use examples, give them practice in a sheltered environment, patiently remind them and cheer for them when they get it right.
God promises to give wisdom to anyone who asks for it. Start praying now that God will give you wisdom in teaching your children and that He will create a desire within each of your students for the wisdom to know how to apply what you are teaching to their everyday lives.
Instead, my group answered with the three following answers: “Pray,” “Go to Church,” and “Read the Bible.”
I felt frustrated . How could I ask the question so they saw that following Jesus is a 24/7 venture, that our faith is not just some basic rules that allow us to barely slip into Heaven? I probed. “What more do you need to do than just read the Bible?” They stared at me. Finally one child answered tentatively, “Think about what you are reading?” That was a start, at least!
“What about doing what the Bible says?” I asked. “What does the Bible tell us to do?” More blank stares. I gave the answers I listed above. I’m not sure they got it. What’s wrong with these kids that they don’t understand that what we are teaching them is to be applied to their every day life? I wondered. I was more frustrated than ever. But I shouldn’t have been.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. Gene, a fellow worker on my mission trip to Austria last spring told me to emphasize the word, “beginning.” Our job as teachers is to move kids beyond the beginning point of wisdom. The beginning of wisdom is knowledge of Jesus. That’s the point my group of students were at. Wisdom is knowing the difference between right and wrong. The greatest form of wisdom, says Gene, is to take what you know and apply it to everyday life.
Teaching children about Jesus is a progression. It doesn’t happen all at once. We first teach who God is, who Jesus is and that we are to honor Him as our Lord. But we don’t stop there, assuming the kids will figure out the rest. We must continue to guide them in gaining wisdom by giving them example after example of how to take what you know and apply it to everyday life.
That’s extra work. That takes some thinking and creativity and lots of prayer for . . . wisdom. Whoever said teaching was easy?
We can’t presume kids will make the connection between knowledge and life application, biblically known as wisdom. Sometimes we have to spell it out, use examples, give them practice in a sheltered environment, patiently remind them and cheer for them when they get it right.
God promises to give wisdom to anyone who asks for it. Start praying now that God will give you wisdom in teaching your children and that He will create a desire within each of your students for the wisdom to know how to apply what you are teaching to their everyday lives.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Teaching Preschoolers: Interview With Brenda Nixon
Last week I shared part of an interview with Brenda Nixon, author of the “Birth to Five” book, a great reference for rearing a preschool child.
Granted, it’s important to start teaching and training a preschool child as early as possible. Some teaching, like potty training or eating habits, is a "Well, duh!" But studies have shown how important it is to give our little ones lots of discovery and exploration time in building their gross and fine motor skills, to introduce them to books and music and art, to give them math based problem solving questions within the scope of play.
But what about their spiritual development? When is a child ready to learn about God – and how much are they ready for? Brenda shares her insights with us this week.
Karen: In your book, you have a chapter on the development of a child’s faith. When should a parent start teaching their child about God?
Brenda: Parents teach from day one! But the "teaching" must be age-appropriate and natural. Just think; when Mom immediately responds to her crying infant with love and nurture. She is already teaching her baby that parents are trustworthy. As the infant ages, and Mom and Dad set rules, boundaries, and limitations on behavior, they're teaching that parents love enough to discipline. When a tot falls down and parents say, "ouwie," they teach empathy. Are these not the qualities of God?
Then, around the age of three - when preschoolers begin to understand concepts like friendship, trust, love, empathy - parents can begin talking about God and how He cares for them in these ways.
Oh, one caution; be careful about too broad of concepts such as sin and redemption, which can still confuse some adults.
Teaching a tot about God isn't limited to reading scripture, teaching a hymn, or telling a Bible story. It's being the parent who expresses relationship with God. Hopefully, we (and I include myself) create a thirst in our kids for relationship with the only Perfect Parent.
Karen: What are some ways parents can incorporate teaching about God into the everyday flow of family life?
Brenda: To answer this question, I'll quote from one chapter in The Birth to Five Book. "As the parent of a tender, impressionable child, you have multiple occasions to teach your child about God. It’s sobering to realize that from birth to 18-years – when he graduates – 85 percent of a child’s waking, learning hours are spent in the home. The home, not the school, is a child’s major class and parents are the first and most important teachers…
Around your home, place visible reminders that testify to your faith in God. I remember the bronze cast of praying hands Mom and Dad had for years in our living room. The well-read family Bible remains on their coffee table today. Now, as a parent, I tape up Bible verses on mirrors, the refrigerator, and even on my car visor. The ones in the car humbly remind me that my children are watching my attitudes towards other drivers. Ask yourself, “Does my home have visual symbols of my faith?”
So, again, you don't have to be perfect to be your child’s spiritual equipper. I also encourage parents to participate in regular church attendance. You want to keep your children surrounded by faith-filled people.
Karen: Since a child can’t see God and preschoolers are concrete thinkers, why should we start teaching them about God? Shouldn’t we wait until they are old enough to understand?
Brenda: Yes and no. How's that for a quick answer? We want to continually and naturally live out and verbally teach our beliefs so children absorb the lessons. If the reverse logic were applied then we wouldn't teach children about concepts such as love or safety until they were in elementary school.
Karen: As you said in your article, “Make Your Child Thirsty...for God,” parents are the primary source of spiritual education. How can a child’s Sunday School or Worship teacher be more helpful in equipping parents or partnering with parents to do this important job?
Brenda: For the Sunday School teacher or children's pastor, I say, remind parents that their participation in church sends a message to their children. It’s a message that they value their community of faith. Church attendance must become a habit of the heart. Encourage parents of your church children to daily teach about our Heavenly Father as commanded in the sixth chapter of Deuteronomy.
Urge parents to weave spiritual lessons into conversations, letters, chores and actions with their kids. Children need to see their parents living out their faith through practices such as; thanking God for nature, reading the Bible, and saying grace before meals. And, of course, I encourage valued teachers to fervently pray for parents and homes today.
Granted, it’s important to start teaching and training a preschool child as early as possible. Some teaching, like potty training or eating habits, is a "Well, duh!" But studies have shown how important it is to give our little ones lots of discovery and exploration time in building their gross and fine motor skills, to introduce them to books and music and art, to give them math based problem solving questions within the scope of play.
But what about their spiritual development? When is a child ready to learn about God – and how much are they ready for? Brenda shares her insights with us this week.
Karen: In your book, you have a chapter on the development of a child’s faith. When should a parent start teaching their child about God?
Brenda: Parents teach from day one! But the "teaching" must be age-appropriate and natural. Just think; when Mom immediately responds to her crying infant with love and nurture. She is already teaching her baby that parents are trustworthy. As the infant ages, and Mom and Dad set rules, boundaries, and limitations on behavior, they're teaching that parents love enough to discipline. When a tot falls down and parents say, "ouwie," they teach empathy. Are these not the qualities of God?
Then, around the age of three - when preschoolers begin to understand concepts like friendship, trust, love, empathy - parents can begin talking about God and how He cares for them in these ways.
Oh, one caution; be careful about too broad of concepts such as sin and redemption, which can still confuse some adults.
Teaching a tot about God isn't limited to reading scripture, teaching a hymn, or telling a Bible story. It's being the parent who expresses relationship with God. Hopefully, we (and I include myself) create a thirst in our kids for relationship with the only Perfect Parent.
Karen: What are some ways parents can incorporate teaching about God into the everyday flow of family life?
Brenda: To answer this question, I'll quote from one chapter in The Birth to Five Book. "As the parent of a tender, impressionable child, you have multiple occasions to teach your child about God. It’s sobering to realize that from birth to 18-years – when he graduates – 85 percent of a child’s waking, learning hours are spent in the home. The home, not the school, is a child’s major class and parents are the first and most important teachers…
Around your home, place visible reminders that testify to your faith in God. I remember the bronze cast of praying hands Mom and Dad had for years in our living room. The well-read family Bible remains on their coffee table today. Now, as a parent, I tape up Bible verses on mirrors, the refrigerator, and even on my car visor. The ones in the car humbly remind me that my children are watching my attitudes towards other drivers. Ask yourself, “Does my home have visual symbols of my faith?”
So, again, you don't have to be perfect to be your child’s spiritual equipper. I also encourage parents to participate in regular church attendance. You want to keep your children surrounded by faith-filled people.
Karen: Since a child can’t see God and preschoolers are concrete thinkers, why should we start teaching them about God? Shouldn’t we wait until they are old enough to understand?
Brenda: Yes and no. How's that for a quick answer? We want to continually and naturally live out and verbally teach our beliefs so children absorb the lessons. If the reverse logic were applied then we wouldn't teach children about concepts such as love or safety until they were in elementary school.
Karen: As you said in your article, “Make Your Child Thirsty...for God,” parents are the primary source of spiritual education. How can a child’s Sunday School or Worship teacher be more helpful in equipping parents or partnering with parents to do this important job?
Brenda: For the Sunday School teacher or children's pastor, I say, remind parents that their participation in church sends a message to their children. It’s a message that they value their community of faith. Church attendance must become a habit of the heart. Encourage parents of your church children to daily teach about our Heavenly Father as commanded in the sixth chapter of Deuteronomy.
Urge parents to weave spiritual lessons into conversations, letters, chores and actions with their kids. Children need to see their parents living out their faith through practices such as; thanking God for nature, reading the Bible, and saying grace before meals. And, of course, I encourage valued teachers to fervently pray for parents and homes today.
Friday, February 06, 2009
Teaching Preschoolers
You need a driver’s license to operate a motor vehicle. But no license is required for guiding another moving object that some parents would vow has more energy than a two-ton pickup – a two year old child. Children don’t come with an operating manual stowed under an arm pit. That’s why books like Brenda Nixon’s “The Birth to Five” book are so hot – and so needed.
I love Brenda’s emphasis, that parents can be empowered to lead and train their children at home from the beginning. If parents poured themselves into teaching and molding their preschoolers, the job of the educator becomes so much easier. Any teacher or children’s ministry worker will tell you that children who come from a stable family where values have been taught and where the parents have done their job in teaching their children about God saves time and energy, decreases discipline problems and creates a more receptive audience.
But many parents feel overwhelmed and unqualified to teach their children whether it’s how to use the potty, how to share toys with a sibling or answering those impossible questions about God a preschooler must stay up at night concocting just to confuse his parents. Usually, all parents have to go on is what they remember from their own childhood. If a child comes from a dysfunctional family background or was the youngest in the family and doesn’t remember their preschool years, they can easily feel like they are floundering. That’s why parent education is just as important as preschool education and why we need books like Brenda’s “Birth To Five.” Book.
Author, speaker and educator Brenda Nixon has dedicated her career to empowering parents. Brenda severed as the parenting expert on FoxTV in Kansas City. “The Birth to Five Book” is her second parenting book. Recently, I caught up with Brenda and asked her about her new book:
Karen: “What led you to write “The Birth To Five” book?”
Brenda: “Years ago I was writing a monthly parenting column for a local paper. Because I was a speaker as well as a writer to parents, I often had audience members come up to me following a presentation asking for help on a variety of childrearing issues. This demand for information led me to give parents words beyond the platform. That's when the idea struck to collect those columns which focused on the early years and put them together in a short, concise book of answers. Since the foundation of the parent/child relationship is laid in the first five years, I believe that's the critical time to empower parents with practical education and encouragement.”
Karen: “What do you love best about preschoolers and their growing awareness of God?”
Brenda: “I love a youngster's innocence and inquisitiveness. Preschoolers are fun, energetic people with lively imaginations so it's fun to be around them, read to them, and engage them in conversation. They accept what adults say as gospel. That's why we must be careful how we phrase explanations about God and our faith. For example, never say "Holy Ghost" when referring to the Holy Spirit, because children link a ghost to something spooky and unfriendly. Many times preschoolers teach me about faith through their simple, steadfast confidence in God.”
Next week, Brenda and I will talk about the importance of teaching preschoolers about God, when to start and what a preschooler needs to know about God.
I love Brenda’s emphasis, that parents can be empowered to lead and train their children at home from the beginning. If parents poured themselves into teaching and molding their preschoolers, the job of the educator becomes so much easier. Any teacher or children’s ministry worker will tell you that children who come from a stable family where values have been taught and where the parents have done their job in teaching their children about God saves time and energy, decreases discipline problems and creates a more receptive audience.
But many parents feel overwhelmed and unqualified to teach their children whether it’s how to use the potty, how to share toys with a sibling or answering those impossible questions about God a preschooler must stay up at night concocting just to confuse his parents. Usually, all parents have to go on is what they remember from their own childhood. If a child comes from a dysfunctional family background or was the youngest in the family and doesn’t remember their preschool years, they can easily feel like they are floundering. That’s why parent education is just as important as preschool education and why we need books like Brenda’s “Birth To Five.” Book.
Author, speaker and educator Brenda Nixon has dedicated her career to empowering parents. Brenda severed as the parenting expert on FoxTV in Kansas City. “The Birth to Five Book” is her second parenting book. Recently, I caught up with Brenda and asked her about her new book:
Karen: “What led you to write “The Birth To Five” book?”
Brenda: “Years ago I was writing a monthly parenting column for a local paper. Because I was a speaker as well as a writer to parents, I often had audience members come up to me following a presentation asking for help on a variety of childrearing issues. This demand for information led me to give parents words beyond the platform. That's when the idea struck to collect those columns which focused on the early years and put them together in a short, concise book of answers. Since the foundation of the parent/child relationship is laid in the first five years, I believe that's the critical time to empower parents with practical education and encouragement.”
Karen: “What do you love best about preschoolers and their growing awareness of God?”
Brenda: “I love a youngster's innocence and inquisitiveness. Preschoolers are fun, energetic people with lively imaginations so it's fun to be around them, read to them, and engage them in conversation. They accept what adults say as gospel. That's why we must be careful how we phrase explanations about God and our faith. For example, never say "Holy Ghost" when referring to the Holy Spirit, because children link a ghost to something spooky and unfriendly. Many times preschoolers teach me about faith through their simple, steadfast confidence in God.”
Next week, Brenda and I will talk about the importance of teaching preschoolers about God, when to start and what a preschooler needs to know about God.
Monday, January 26, 2009
The Salvation of an Exceptionl Child
Last week, someone left a comment regarding the salvation of a Down’s Syndrome child.
First of all, I want to applaud the courage and diligence of families and teachers who work with these precious children. You are taught by the Lord to see our children not as the rest of the world sees, to value the gifts unappreciated by the rest of society. God has a plan for these special children, just as He has a plan for each one of us and He uses these special children to teach the rest of us lessons about ourselves, about giving, about the value of life.
I believe Scripture teaches that people come to Christ at an age of accountability. We cannot repent of sin if we don’t know what sin is. Many theological concepts are abstract ideas; a child is basically a concrete thinker until about age nine or ten. If children accept Christ at a younger age, they usually have a very rudimentary understanding. Both my girls accepted Christ at age eight. We had taught them and reviewed with them how someone becomes a Christian since they were six. For both of them, it took a personal recognition that they had done something wrong, they were responsible and that was not the way God wanted them to live.
When dealing with children with learning difficulties, we need to take their learning capabilities into consideration. They may be 14 years old chronologically, yet what is their mental age? Would you expect a mentally disabled child with the mind of a six year old to make decisions and use judgment normally shown in 14 year olds? No.
So, if a child never advances beyond the mentality of a six year old, what happens to their salvation? It’s an agonizing question many parents have asked and even more parents who have lost young children to death have asked as well. Remember, our God is a gracious and merciful God. He cares deeply about the little ones. I believe that God holds these precious children innocent. If a child dies before reaching that age (or mental age of accountability), I believe they will go to Heaven.
If you do discuss salvation with your child, do so in the most simplistic terms, appropriate for his or her mental age level. Answer questions simply. Don’t push salvation. Talk freely and often of Jesus’ love and constant presence. If your child shows signs of rebelliousness, they may be able to then understand the concepts of sin and repentance and the need to follow Jesus. However, analyze the behavior. Are they being rebellious because they are mimicking the behavior of others? Are they doing the actions in ignorance? Are they acting out of frustration and anger at their limitations?
Our special children may surprise us. We think so much in terms of what children understand mentally that we forget to consider what the spirit understands. I love the story of Tim, a savant who plays the piano brilliantly yet probably has the capacity of an eight year old. Tim was playing the piano at a cafeteria for pay. He played only hymns. The manager asked him to play some secular music, that customers were getting tired of all that religious stuff. Tim stood up, shut the piano lid, and said, “If I can’t play for Jesus, I’m not playing at all,” and walked out the door.
So my advice to this mom who is concerned about the salvation of her Down’s syndrome child is this: Be patient. Keep loving your child. Talk about the things he can understand. Heaven and hell are pretty abstract concepts that are tough for most 14 year olds, much more so for a Down’s syndrome child. In time, God will speak to the spirit of your child; in the meantime, God loves your boy very much and in His mercy and graciousness will not let him perish.
Two resources to consider:
“Extraordinary Kids” by Cheri Fuller
“Exceptional Teaching” by Jim Pierson
Also check out the ministry of Joni and Friends. They may have resources on children with Down’s Syndrome.
First of all, I want to applaud the courage and diligence of families and teachers who work with these precious children. You are taught by the Lord to see our children not as the rest of the world sees, to value the gifts unappreciated by the rest of society. God has a plan for these special children, just as He has a plan for each one of us and He uses these special children to teach the rest of us lessons about ourselves, about giving, about the value of life.
I believe Scripture teaches that people come to Christ at an age of accountability. We cannot repent of sin if we don’t know what sin is. Many theological concepts are abstract ideas; a child is basically a concrete thinker until about age nine or ten. If children accept Christ at a younger age, they usually have a very rudimentary understanding. Both my girls accepted Christ at age eight. We had taught them and reviewed with them how someone becomes a Christian since they were six. For both of them, it took a personal recognition that they had done something wrong, they were responsible and that was not the way God wanted them to live.
When dealing with children with learning difficulties, we need to take their learning capabilities into consideration. They may be 14 years old chronologically, yet what is their mental age? Would you expect a mentally disabled child with the mind of a six year old to make decisions and use judgment normally shown in 14 year olds? No.
So, if a child never advances beyond the mentality of a six year old, what happens to their salvation? It’s an agonizing question many parents have asked and even more parents who have lost young children to death have asked as well. Remember, our God is a gracious and merciful God. He cares deeply about the little ones. I believe that God holds these precious children innocent. If a child dies before reaching that age (or mental age of accountability), I believe they will go to Heaven.
If you do discuss salvation with your child, do so in the most simplistic terms, appropriate for his or her mental age level. Answer questions simply. Don’t push salvation. Talk freely and often of Jesus’ love and constant presence. If your child shows signs of rebelliousness, they may be able to then understand the concepts of sin and repentance and the need to follow Jesus. However, analyze the behavior. Are they being rebellious because they are mimicking the behavior of others? Are they doing the actions in ignorance? Are they acting out of frustration and anger at their limitations?
Our special children may surprise us. We think so much in terms of what children understand mentally that we forget to consider what the spirit understands. I love the story of Tim, a savant who plays the piano brilliantly yet probably has the capacity of an eight year old. Tim was playing the piano at a cafeteria for pay. He played only hymns. The manager asked him to play some secular music, that customers were getting tired of all that religious stuff. Tim stood up, shut the piano lid, and said, “If I can’t play for Jesus, I’m not playing at all,” and walked out the door.
So my advice to this mom who is concerned about the salvation of her Down’s syndrome child is this: Be patient. Keep loving your child. Talk about the things he can understand. Heaven and hell are pretty abstract concepts that are tough for most 14 year olds, much more so for a Down’s syndrome child. In time, God will speak to the spirit of your child; in the meantime, God loves your boy very much and in His mercy and graciousness will not let him perish.
Two resources to consider:
“Extraordinary Kids” by Cheri Fuller
“Exceptional Teaching” by Jim Pierson
Also check out the ministry of Joni and Friends. They may have resources on children with Down’s Syndrome.
Monday, January 19, 2009
The Treasures of Teaching
Early in his ministry, as recorded in Matthew 13, Jesus started to speak to the crowds in parables. “Whoa, wait a minute!” The twelve disciples found the first available moment to throw up their hands with confusion. “Why are you speaking to the people in parables (v. 10)?”
Without criticizing them for asking, Jesus explained why he was using parables, then revealed the meaning of the parable of the sower. He told another parable. They asked for an interpretation. He explained again. He backtracked a little by adding an introduction to his parables – ‘The Kingdom of Heaven is like . . . “ Perhaps he did this to help their brains connect with the fact that he was using the technique of an extended metaphor.
If you notice Jesus’ methodology in the rest of Matthew 13, he continued to share a number of smaller parables, one right after another. What a fantastic teaching technique! He was giving these guys practice in getting the hang of parable interpretation.
Finally, Jesus asked, “Have you understood all these things?” The disciples replied, “Yes.” I put my Bible down at that point. Wasn’t that a little arrogant of those guys? Did they really understand completely? Yet, I guess if I had been drilled over and over and I was finally catching the rhyme and rhythm of a parable, I would have answer “yes” as well. Yet, lurking in the recesses of my mind would be a smudge of uncertainty as to whether I really knew it as well as I should.
I think Jesus understood this because He then made a wonderful comment about teaching: “Therefore, every teacher of the law who has been instructed about the kingdom of heaven is like the owner of a house who brings out of his storeroom new treasures as well as old (Matthew 13:52).”
Teachers never stop learning! That’s the best part about teaching!
Years ago, our Sunday School superintendent tried to recruit a new teacher. “I don’t know enough to teach,” the woman said.
“That’s all right,” the older woman replied. “Each week, you will prepare your lesson and you will learn. You will end up learning far more than your students learn.”
That is so true. As teachers teach, they display time honored truths more precious than beloved antiques. Because teachers continue to be learners, they also share the excitement of their own new discoveries in the faith.
The most effective teacher is the teacher who keeps on learning, who keeps studying the lesson, learning more than the students. It’s the teacher who is willing to apply God’s Word to his or her own life in order to be able to share with glowing eyes the following Sunday, “Look what I discovered about Jesus this week.”
Thursday, January 15, 2009
A Devilish Deal: Compromising the Growth of your Children’s Ministry Program
The legend of Faust tells the story of how the scholar Faust makes a compact with the devil. The devil increases Faust’s knowledge of magic and gives him twenty four years of power and pleasure. After that, Faust’s soul belongs to the devil (Source: Encarta).
No one in children’s ministry would ever do that! Yet, at times we’re so desperate to see our program succeed, to experience growth, to have any kind of children’s ministry at all, that we make compromises that aren’t necessarily God’s will. Unconsciously, innocently, we make deals with the devil for something we believe is a good thing.
True, children’s ministry takes sacrifices. In order to have a successful children’ s ministry, both the church at large and individuals will need to compromise time, energy, and resources that would normally go to other programs. The church might get a little noisier, some workers might not get to as many adult worship services as they’d like, and some people in the pew might feel a bit of loss of control as the halls of the church teem with energetic children.
But sometimes, we want growth so badly, we inadvertently let go of other things we say we value. What are you willing to forgo in order to have that successful children’s ministry? Is the cost too great? I’ve learned the hard way that some of the following aren’t worth the sacrifice:
1. Doctrine. Of course not, you might say. But how many times do we water down the gospel message so kids will keep coming? Coupled with this is our entire spiritual emphasis. Do we replace the spiritual activities with food and fun just so the kids will keep coming? Yes, I know that fellowship can be a great time of building relationships with kids. Yet we always need to keep our eye on the purpose for which we exist, always being on our guard to keep from slipping into an all-fun atmosphere. The temptation toprovide activities that will keep them coming is like the slow oozing, sucking trap of quicksand; it can happen slowly and more subtly than you think.
2. Discipline and accountability: When someone questions what is happening in the youth program, have you heard the defense, “Oh, but the kids are having so much fun,” or “But we’re having decisions and new visitors every week” or “You don’t want to be too hard on the kids; it will undermine the love and acceptance we’re trying to teach them.” Church leaders bite their lips, hating to knock success. Yet accountability is extremely important. Your youth leaders need to be liable to someone, the elders, a youth ministry team, or the pastor. This includes accountability for finances, discipline, boundaries in use of church facilities, recruitment standards, and curriculum. Ministry is not a Lone Ranger mentality. It’s a team effort among many people and all team players to know and have a say in what is happening. To protect ourselves spiritually and fiscally, we need to be accountable to someone.
3. Direction: Small churches especially have problems with this one. So desperate for volunteers and new students, we let the personal enthusiasm of a new worker carry us away, then we turn our heads so we don’t see the oncoming train wreck. Every ministry program needs a plan. What do you hope to accomplish? How are you going to get there? What can you afford? Who is going to be in charge? What will be most effective for your community? No program in the church can exist for very long solely on the personality of a charismatic leader. You need to have a plan, supported with prayer.
4. Discernment: God’s word gives direction on choosing leaders. I believe that a children’ ministry director or youth leader are two of the key positions in the church and therefore, are subject to the same qualifications as listed for elders and deacons given in Paul’s first letter to Timothy. A youth leader should know how to manage his own children, should be well thought of in the community, should be self controlled and equipped to teach the doctrines of the faith. Just because we’re desperate for a youth worker does not give us permission to set aside these qualifications. If we do, we’re compromising our program and it will never be fully effective as God intends it to be.
You see, God cares more that we do ministry right than He cares about the growth of the program. If we follow His word and do ministry His way, He will bring the increase.
No one in children’s ministry would ever do that! Yet, at times we’re so desperate to see our program succeed, to experience growth, to have any kind of children’s ministry at all, that we make compromises that aren’t necessarily God’s will. Unconsciously, innocently, we make deals with the devil for something we believe is a good thing.
True, children’s ministry takes sacrifices. In order to have a successful children’ s ministry, both the church at large and individuals will need to compromise time, energy, and resources that would normally go to other programs. The church might get a little noisier, some workers might not get to as many adult worship services as they’d like, and some people in the pew might feel a bit of loss of control as the halls of the church teem with energetic children.
But sometimes, we want growth so badly, we inadvertently let go of other things we say we value. What are you willing to forgo in order to have that successful children’s ministry? Is the cost too great? I’ve learned the hard way that some of the following aren’t worth the sacrifice:
1. Doctrine. Of course not, you might say. But how many times do we water down the gospel message so kids will keep coming? Coupled with this is our entire spiritual emphasis. Do we replace the spiritual activities with food and fun just so the kids will keep coming? Yes, I know that fellowship can be a great time of building relationships with kids. Yet we always need to keep our eye on the purpose for which we exist, always being on our guard to keep from slipping into an all-fun atmosphere. The temptation toprovide activities that will keep them coming is like the slow oozing, sucking trap of quicksand; it can happen slowly and more subtly than you think.
2. Discipline and accountability: When someone questions what is happening in the youth program, have you heard the defense, “Oh, but the kids are having so much fun,” or “But we’re having decisions and new visitors every week” or “You don’t want to be too hard on the kids; it will undermine the love and acceptance we’re trying to teach them.” Church leaders bite their lips, hating to knock success. Yet accountability is extremely important. Your youth leaders need to be liable to someone, the elders, a youth ministry team, or the pastor. This includes accountability for finances, discipline, boundaries in use of church facilities, recruitment standards, and curriculum. Ministry is not a Lone Ranger mentality. It’s a team effort among many people and all team players to know and have a say in what is happening. To protect ourselves spiritually and fiscally, we need to be accountable to someone.
3. Direction: Small churches especially have problems with this one. So desperate for volunteers and new students, we let the personal enthusiasm of a new worker carry us away, then we turn our heads so we don’t see the oncoming train wreck. Every ministry program needs a plan. What do you hope to accomplish? How are you going to get there? What can you afford? Who is going to be in charge? What will be most effective for your community? No program in the church can exist for very long solely on the personality of a charismatic leader. You need to have a plan, supported with prayer.
4. Discernment: God’s word gives direction on choosing leaders. I believe that a children’ ministry director or youth leader are two of the key positions in the church and therefore, are subject to the same qualifications as listed for elders and deacons given in Paul’s first letter to Timothy. A youth leader should know how to manage his own children, should be well thought of in the community, should be self controlled and equipped to teach the doctrines of the faith. Just because we’re desperate for a youth worker does not give us permission to set aside these qualifications. If we do, we’re compromising our program and it will never be fully effective as God intends it to be.
You see, God cares more that we do ministry right than He cares about the growth of the program. If we follow His word and do ministry His way, He will bring the increase.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
American Foreign Policy and Classroom Discipline
In her book, “Condi: The Condoleeza Rice Story,” Antonia Felix explains Secretary Rice’s description of one difference between liberals and conservatives that I had never heard before but that makes sense to me. In the area of foreign policy, conservatives are realists and liberals are idealists. Realists recognize that a nation will fight when its national self interest is threatened; that it is in the best interest of our nation to stand firm and to uphold our moral values when they are threatened by a show of power from another nation. Idealists believe that the best chance for peace lies in cooperation. In other words, realists want to meet power with power; idealists want to sit down and “talk about it,” assuming that the other side is also interested in “talking about it.”
What does this have to do with children’s ministry? I see the same opposing views from children’s ministry workers. Part of our job in teaching children is to recognize sources of authority, that God is ultimately in charge of our lives. But children and youth, just like the rest of us sinful creatures, want to be in control. Power, as one of Dr. Rice’s favorite authors explained, is the “control of man over man.”
Does that mean any misbehavior can be couched in terms of a power struggle: adult vs. child? Actually, children misbehave in your classroom for one of several reasons: 1) They’re tired and cranky and need their basic physical needs met, 2) they are wanting attention and don’t know appropriate ways to get it. 3) their inexperience causes them to make poor choices, or 4) they are in rebellion mode and want to be in control of their own lives.
Too often over the past fifty years, the church has been seen as a legalistic rules oriented institution. I’ve heard stories of people who felt like the church tried to push a religion of rules on them. I’ve seen teachers act with harsh words, displaying the attitude of “Let’s shape them up.”
Yet I’ve also seen the extreme of the compassion and cooperation model. This attitude projects that any discipline will demoralize the children’s self-esteem. Sadly, the right to discipline has been stripped away from our public schools in the interest of not damaging children’s self image. Parents, teachers and youth workers alike think that we should be able to “just talk about it” and the child will accept our ideology.
The results? A different kind of tyranny. Students become disrespectful, out of control and destructive because they know no one will touch them. They end up controlling us.
So what’s the answer when we face a power struggle with children within the church? Like the political realist, we must stand firm and protect the best interests of God’s Kingdom. We must not allow anything to undermine the values we hold dear as expressed in the Bible. We must teach our children about justice and proper models of authority.
We can learn from the idealists too. We need to show compassion. We need to make sure we don’t automatically label infraction as a power struggle but take the time to understand other reasons for the errant behavior. We must look at our own motives: do we want the children to behave in a certain way because we are trying to teach them how to live holy lives or because we’re on a power kick and it jives us when children follow our lead?
The Bible, our Sourcebook for all that we do in children’s ministry, has a pithy five word phrase for how we need to help our children and each other grow up so that we accept Christ as the Head, the one ultimately in charge of our lives: “ . . .speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15).” We don’t speak harshly but we do teach and stand by the authority of Jesus Christ, teaching with patience, gentleness and diligence.
God always did have the best idea.
What does this have to do with children’s ministry? I see the same opposing views from children’s ministry workers. Part of our job in teaching children is to recognize sources of authority, that God is ultimately in charge of our lives. But children and youth, just like the rest of us sinful creatures, want to be in control. Power, as one of Dr. Rice’s favorite authors explained, is the “control of man over man.”
Does that mean any misbehavior can be couched in terms of a power struggle: adult vs. child? Actually, children misbehave in your classroom for one of several reasons: 1) They’re tired and cranky and need their basic physical needs met, 2) they are wanting attention and don’t know appropriate ways to get it. 3) their inexperience causes them to make poor choices, or 4) they are in rebellion mode and want to be in control of their own lives.
Too often over the past fifty years, the church has been seen as a legalistic rules oriented institution. I’ve heard stories of people who felt like the church tried to push a religion of rules on them. I’ve seen teachers act with harsh words, displaying the attitude of “Let’s shape them up.”
Yet I’ve also seen the extreme of the compassion and cooperation model. This attitude projects that any discipline will demoralize the children’s self-esteem. Sadly, the right to discipline has been stripped away from our public schools in the interest of not damaging children’s self image. Parents, teachers and youth workers alike think that we should be able to “just talk about it” and the child will accept our ideology.
The results? A different kind of tyranny. Students become disrespectful, out of control and destructive because they know no one will touch them. They end up controlling us.
So what’s the answer when we face a power struggle with children within the church? Like the political realist, we must stand firm and protect the best interests of God’s Kingdom. We must not allow anything to undermine the values we hold dear as expressed in the Bible. We must teach our children about justice and proper models of authority.
We can learn from the idealists too. We need to show compassion. We need to make sure we don’t automatically label infraction as a power struggle but take the time to understand other reasons for the errant behavior. We must look at our own motives: do we want the children to behave in a certain way because we are trying to teach them how to live holy lives or because we’re on a power kick and it jives us when children follow our lead?
The Bible, our Sourcebook for all that we do in children’s ministry, has a pithy five word phrase for how we need to help our children and each other grow up so that we accept Christ as the Head, the one ultimately in charge of our lives: “ . . .speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15).” We don’t speak harshly but we do teach and stand by the authority of Jesus Christ, teaching with patience, gentleness and diligence.
God always did have the best idea.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Walking With Grandpa
It was a bright, sunny morning, not unusual for Tucson, Arizona. Ninety percent of the time, mornings were always clear and sunny. The inconvenience of bright and sunny mornings in Arizona is that bright sunny mornings turn into hot sunny days. If you want to do anything outdoors, from walking to watering your lawn, best to do it early.
Grandpa and I were out walking, not unusual for us either. I often took walks with my grandfather. Sometimes our walks had purpose, like walking up to a nearby store. Other times, like that day, we walked just to walk. Grandpa never said much on our walks. In fact, when Grandma shooed him out the door to take walks with the kids, he would often mutter under his breath. But I knew he enjoyed them. I could tell by the broad grin that spread across his face when he thought no one was looking, a smile accentuated by his weather wrinkled face.
We reached a four lane minor artery near the neighborhood park. In a childlike display of affection, I slipped my hand into his hand. When we reached the other side, he let go and I was embarrassed at my childlike action. He probably interpreted my gesture as nervousness over the busy highway and that I needed his hand as a security shield. At ten years old, I was too old to hold hands with my grandpa for such a simple reason as affection. Yet that is what I had meant it to be – a silent gesture that I loved walking with my grandpa. He always called me his little girl. I still regret telling him at one point I was a grown up girl and he needn’t call me that anymore. It took years for both of us to get over that. Now, when he calls me his little girl, I stow it away like a precious diamond nestled among the other treasures of my memory chest.
Walks with Grandpa became more numerous over the years. One day, we walked over five miles to his brother’s house, nestled against the mountains, just to see if we could do it. I was relieved when Uncle Eldon offered us a ride back into town. We walked with Grandma and Grandpa along the hiking trails that crisscrossed the mountain ranges surrounding Tucson. When they moved to Sedona, Arizona, we would walk several miles to eat lunch at a local restaurant. After such a strenuous walk, I wondered why Grandma still fussed at Grandpa’s food selections. In their late sixties, they walked with my sister and cousins down the Grand Canyon, a walk I regreted I would never have with them because they, like us, were growing older.
The walks became more symbolic as Grandpa journeyed with us through the important moments of our lives. Grandpa offered to drive both my sister and me at separate times to bible college, hundreds of miles away. Not yet a believer, Grandpa let us know in no uncertain terms, that he thought we were wasting our time. However, if that’s what we wanted to do, he would make sure we got there and got settled well. It seemed only natural that Grandpa would be the one who walked me down the aisle when I met my husband to be at the nuptial altar. I dare think he was as nervous as I was!
My last memory of my grandmother was seeing her and Grandpa turn from their goodbyes at our rented car to walk hand in hand along the sidewalk surrounding their retirement building. After age 80, it no longer mattered who saw you hold hands or kiss or say “I love you.” Another poignant moment came when Grandpa, age 85, walked anther aisle to take the minister’s hand and acknowledge his desire to make Jesus Lord of his life.
My grandfather is now taking another walk, a journey on which we cannot go with him but we will surely follow him someday. At 96, as he battles congestive heart failure, he is walking toward the end of his life and we all know, without saying much, that the end of that walk is drawing near when he will reach the throne of Almighty God and take his Savior’s hand.
Grandparents can have a powerful influence on their grandchildren. When the world is topsy-turvy with economic crisis, family disintegration and the fear of terrorism, a grandparent can be the security a child needs. Sometimes, all it takes is to be there and walk with your grandchildren – just as Grandpa walked with me. If you are a believer in Christ, you have a crucial opportunity to let your grandchild walk that faith journey with you. As you walk, you can demonstrate to them how to walk with the Savior.
Grandpa and I were out walking, not unusual for us either. I often took walks with my grandfather. Sometimes our walks had purpose, like walking up to a nearby store. Other times, like that day, we walked just to walk. Grandpa never said much on our walks. In fact, when Grandma shooed him out the door to take walks with the kids, he would often mutter under his breath. But I knew he enjoyed them. I could tell by the broad grin that spread across his face when he thought no one was looking, a smile accentuated by his weather wrinkled face.
We reached a four lane minor artery near the neighborhood park. In a childlike display of affection, I slipped my hand into his hand. When we reached the other side, he let go and I was embarrassed at my childlike action. He probably interpreted my gesture as nervousness over the busy highway and that I needed his hand as a security shield. At ten years old, I was too old to hold hands with my grandpa for such a simple reason as affection. Yet that is what I had meant it to be – a silent gesture that I loved walking with my grandpa. He always called me his little girl. I still regret telling him at one point I was a grown up girl and he needn’t call me that anymore. It took years for both of us to get over that. Now, when he calls me his little girl, I stow it away like a precious diamond nestled among the other treasures of my memory chest.
Walks with Grandpa became more numerous over the years. One day, we walked over five miles to his brother’s house, nestled against the mountains, just to see if we could do it. I was relieved when Uncle Eldon offered us a ride back into town. We walked with Grandma and Grandpa along the hiking trails that crisscrossed the mountain ranges surrounding Tucson. When they moved to Sedona, Arizona, we would walk several miles to eat lunch at a local restaurant. After such a strenuous walk, I wondered why Grandma still fussed at Grandpa’s food selections. In their late sixties, they walked with my sister and cousins down the Grand Canyon, a walk I regreted I would never have with them because they, like us, were growing older.
The walks became more symbolic as Grandpa journeyed with us through the important moments of our lives. Grandpa offered to drive both my sister and me at separate times to bible college, hundreds of miles away. Not yet a believer, Grandpa let us know in no uncertain terms, that he thought we were wasting our time. However, if that’s what we wanted to do, he would make sure we got there and got settled well. It seemed only natural that Grandpa would be the one who walked me down the aisle when I met my husband to be at the nuptial altar. I dare think he was as nervous as I was!
My last memory of my grandmother was seeing her and Grandpa turn from their goodbyes at our rented car to walk hand in hand along the sidewalk surrounding their retirement building. After age 80, it no longer mattered who saw you hold hands or kiss or say “I love you.” Another poignant moment came when Grandpa, age 85, walked anther aisle to take the minister’s hand and acknowledge his desire to make Jesus Lord of his life.
My grandfather is now taking another walk, a journey on which we cannot go with him but we will surely follow him someday. At 96, as he battles congestive heart failure, he is walking toward the end of his life and we all know, without saying much, that the end of that walk is drawing near when he will reach the throne of Almighty God and take his Savior’s hand.
Grandparents can have a powerful influence on their grandchildren. When the world is topsy-turvy with economic crisis, family disintegration and the fear of terrorism, a grandparent can be the security a child needs. Sometimes, all it takes is to be there and walk with your grandchildren – just as Grandpa walked with me. If you are a believer in Christ, you have a crucial opportunity to let your grandchild walk that faith journey with you. As you walk, you can demonstrate to them how to walk with the Savior.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Bible Christmas Quiz
Tomorrow is the Sunday before Christmas. Adult services might run long. Do you have an extra activity planned in case you have too much time and not enough lesson? What about your bible story for tomorrow? How do you tell a story that your students have heard many times in a fresh appealing way?
Maybe your students don’t know that Christmas story as well as they think they do! Here is a Christmas quiz you can give them, With thanks to Standard Publishing, I’m borrowing a quiz from the VBS Anytime series, “The Incredible Race” which is a wonderful curriculum. Test your Christmas knowledge then see how well your students do.
1. True or False: Mary rode on the back of a donkey to get to Bethlehem.
2. True or False: May gave birth the same night she and Joseph arrived in Bethlehem.
3. True or False: An innkeeper offered them the only accommodations he had left.
4. True or False: Jesus was born in a stable.
5. True or False: Being a perfect baby, Jesus never cried.
6. True or False: Angels appeared to the shepherds, announcing Christ’s birth and singing praises to God.
7. True or False: There were angels present at the manger scene.
8. True or False: A drummer boy accompanied the wise men to the manger.
9. True or False: There were three wise men.
10. True or False: Jesus was born on December 25th.
How well do you think you did? Guess what? All of the questions are false. Most of these assumptions have sprung from tradition but the Bible is silent on these details so therefore, we cannot assume that they are true. We just don’t know! Just because there were three gifts does not necessarily mean there were three Wise men. Donkeys were often used for pack animals. Ladies, can you imagine trying to mount a donkey while nine months pregnant? Songs and pictures of the manger scene are not gospel truth. While there might have been angels at the manger scene, the Bible never says there were. The Drummer Boy is just a song.
I love the one about the manger! Who says a manger has to have been in a stable. It could have been out in a field to provide food for the animals there. We can’t even assume that the straw in the manger was clean!
We do know this. Jesus was born in the lowest of situations and had visitors from the lowest socioeconomic status. What humility! It was enough for the Lord to take human form yet He chose to enter at the world’s lowest level too!
Thank you! Thank you Lord Jesus, for entering our world, born in poverty, death as a criminal. You loved us that much. Thank you!
Maybe your students don’t know that Christmas story as well as they think they do! Here is a Christmas quiz you can give them, With thanks to Standard Publishing, I’m borrowing a quiz from the VBS Anytime series, “The Incredible Race” which is a wonderful curriculum. Test your Christmas knowledge then see how well your students do.
1. True or False: Mary rode on the back of a donkey to get to Bethlehem.
2. True or False: May gave birth the same night she and Joseph arrived in Bethlehem.
3. True or False: An innkeeper offered them the only accommodations he had left.
4. True or False: Jesus was born in a stable.
5. True or False: Being a perfect baby, Jesus never cried.
6. True or False: Angels appeared to the shepherds, announcing Christ’s birth and singing praises to God.
7. True or False: There were angels present at the manger scene.
8. True or False: A drummer boy accompanied the wise men to the manger.
9. True or False: There were three wise men.
10. True or False: Jesus was born on December 25th.
How well do you think you did? Guess what? All of the questions are false. Most of these assumptions have sprung from tradition but the Bible is silent on these details so therefore, we cannot assume that they are true. We just don’t know! Just because there were three gifts does not necessarily mean there were three Wise men. Donkeys were often used for pack animals. Ladies, can you imagine trying to mount a donkey while nine months pregnant? Songs and pictures of the manger scene are not gospel truth. While there might have been angels at the manger scene, the Bible never says there were. The Drummer Boy is just a song.
I love the one about the manger! Who says a manger has to have been in a stable. It could have been out in a field to provide food for the animals there. We can’t even assume that the straw in the manger was clean!
We do know this. Jesus was born in the lowest of situations and had visitors from the lowest socioeconomic status. What humility! It was enough for the Lord to take human form yet He chose to enter at the world’s lowest level too!
Thank you! Thank you Lord Jesus, for entering our world, born in poverty, death as a criminal. You loved us that much. Thank you!
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Children's Christmas Service Projects
Did you hear about the eight year old boy who, when his parents asked him what he wanted for Christmas, said he wanted to give toys to sick children? So he and his parents took a bunch of toys to give to patients at a Children’s Hospital.
Perhaps you are thinking, “I wish that was my child” or “I wish that child existed in my classroom.” My thoughts were, “I’d like to meet this child’s parents!” What kind of example did they set for this child to have such a giving spirit? Even if that generous spirit came from deep within, kudos to those parents who put legs on a little boy’s dream and made it happen!
For the rest of us, we often find ourselves despairing about our children’s greedy attitudes at Christmas. Yet, like anything, character traits don’t just happen. They have to be taught. We can help our children grow in generosity by doing service projects with them at Christmas time. Here are some ideas:
1. Take fruit baskets to elderly folks in your neighborhood or who attend your church. Greet them with caroling.
2. Go Christmas caroling at a local nursing home. Have one or two of the children bring a pet along. Make sure the pet is well behaved and loves people. A Labrador or Golden Retriever or a Welsh Corgi have great personalities for nursing home visits. Get approval from the home before you do this and have an adult keep a careful eye on the pet.
3. Take treats to a nursing home. One year, our church youth group dressed up in Halloween costumes at Halloween, went to a nursing home, and gave each resident a banana. This was a great idea because we didn’t have to worry about whether someone was diabetic and couldn’t eat candy or cookies.
4. Offer to decorate doors of rooms at a nursing home. Better yet, offer to help a nursing home or children’s hospital take down decorations after Christmas is over.
5. Make a care package for a recently unemployed family. Decorate a basket and fill it with cocoa mix, tea bags, a tub of cappuccino mix, some cookies, muffin mix, a small bottle of dish detergent, a small kitchen widget and a couple of candy canes.
6. Become involved in Operation Christmas Child sponsored by Samaritan’s Purse. Participants fill shoeboxes with specified items, such as school supplies or personal care items and send it to Samaritan’s Purse to be distributed to needy children in other countires. One local church asked families to send $5 with their child to a youth meeting. The youth sponsors then took the children to the local dollar store and let the children purchase items they could put in the shoeboxes.
If you would rather help local families, your class or family could take the same basic idea of filling a shoebox for a needy child. I love the idea of letting the children shop for the items of their choice. This works on several levels. It allows the child to take ownership of the project. It also teaches some valuable lessons about money management.
The greatest way we can show thankfulness for the gift God gave us through Jesus Christ His Son is to give to others. The essence of giving at Christmas is not to give obligatory gifts to those who will give back to us or who have no need for what we give. Christ gave us what we needed most and what we were helpless to provide for ourselves – salvation. Let’s mirror the love of Christ by giving to others what they need most. Let’s involve our children so they too can learn the art of giving.
Perhaps you are thinking, “I wish that was my child” or “I wish that child existed in my classroom.” My thoughts were, “I’d like to meet this child’s parents!” What kind of example did they set for this child to have such a giving spirit? Even if that generous spirit came from deep within, kudos to those parents who put legs on a little boy’s dream and made it happen!
For the rest of us, we often find ourselves despairing about our children’s greedy attitudes at Christmas. Yet, like anything, character traits don’t just happen. They have to be taught. We can help our children grow in generosity by doing service projects with them at Christmas time. Here are some ideas:
1. Take fruit baskets to elderly folks in your neighborhood or who attend your church. Greet them with caroling.
2. Go Christmas caroling at a local nursing home. Have one or two of the children bring a pet along. Make sure the pet is well behaved and loves people. A Labrador or Golden Retriever or a Welsh Corgi have great personalities for nursing home visits. Get approval from the home before you do this and have an adult keep a careful eye on the pet.
3. Take treats to a nursing home. One year, our church youth group dressed up in Halloween costumes at Halloween, went to a nursing home, and gave each resident a banana. This was a great idea because we didn’t have to worry about whether someone was diabetic and couldn’t eat candy or cookies.
4. Offer to decorate doors of rooms at a nursing home. Better yet, offer to help a nursing home or children’s hospital take down decorations after Christmas is over.
5. Make a care package for a recently unemployed family. Decorate a basket and fill it with cocoa mix, tea bags, a tub of cappuccino mix, some cookies, muffin mix, a small bottle of dish detergent, a small kitchen widget and a couple of candy canes.
6. Become involved in Operation Christmas Child sponsored by Samaritan’s Purse. Participants fill shoeboxes with specified items, such as school supplies or personal care items and send it to Samaritan’s Purse to be distributed to needy children in other countires. One local church asked families to send $5 with their child to a youth meeting. The youth sponsors then took the children to the local dollar store and let the children purchase items they could put in the shoeboxes.
If you would rather help local families, your class or family could take the same basic idea of filling a shoebox for a needy child. I love the idea of letting the children shop for the items of their choice. This works on several levels. It allows the child to take ownership of the project. It also teaches some valuable lessons about money management.
The greatest way we can show thankfulness for the gift God gave us through Jesus Christ His Son is to give to others. The essence of giving at Christmas is not to give obligatory gifts to those who will give back to us or who have no need for what we give. Christ gave us what we needed most and what we were helpless to provide for ourselves – salvation. Let’s mirror the love of Christ by giving to others what they need most. Let’s involve our children so they too can learn the art of giving.
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Classroom Christmas Crafts and Activities
Classroom Christmas Crafts
Christmas! What an exciting time in a children’s ministry classroom! Students may come to your classroom that have never darkened your door before. As a teacher, you have the privilege to tell the most precious story on earth – the story that God himself stuffed the divine presence of His Son into human form so the Son could lead the world back to God.
All right, so you’ve told the same story year after year. The kids could tell you the story. How can you drive home the magnitude of what God did for us on that Christmas night so long ago without your kids yawning, interrupting you to tell you about the latest toy they want or without your students bouncing off the walls from too many candy canes and too many shopping trips?
Make the story fresh. As St. Francis of Assisi once said, “Preach the gospel at all times. If necessary, use words.” What other ways can you tell the Christmas story? You can use skits, music, crafts, snacks, games; service projects; anything that reinforces the message of Christ coming to this earth.
Beware! It’s so easy to choose activities that celebrate Christmas in a general way, that fall into the trap of the secular symbols of Christmas. As a children’s ministry worker, you want to be different. You want your message to stand out in stark contrast to what the students are getting elsewhere. Choose crafts and other activities that present the biblical message in a strong and compelling way.
Recently, I’ve been looking for a craft that emphasizes the Nativity. I found some great possibilities on the Internet. Check out these websites for Nativity craft projects for kids.
www.daniellesplace.com (a great website for all kinds of bible crafts)
www.teacherhelp.org
www.christiancrafters.com
www.dltk-holidays.com (A wonderful felt board nativity set here. I think I will use this activity for my group.)
www.familyfun.com (This is a secular site but I often find ideas here that I can adapt for my bible lessons.)
Next week, I’ll share some service projects for kids to do at Christmas.
Christmas! What an exciting time in a children’s ministry classroom! Students may come to your classroom that have never darkened your door before. As a teacher, you have the privilege to tell the most precious story on earth – the story that God himself stuffed the divine presence of His Son into human form so the Son could lead the world back to God.
All right, so you’ve told the same story year after year. The kids could tell you the story. How can you drive home the magnitude of what God did for us on that Christmas night so long ago without your kids yawning, interrupting you to tell you about the latest toy they want or without your students bouncing off the walls from too many candy canes and too many shopping trips?
Make the story fresh. As St. Francis of Assisi once said, “Preach the gospel at all times. If necessary, use words.” What other ways can you tell the Christmas story? You can use skits, music, crafts, snacks, games; service projects; anything that reinforces the message of Christ coming to this earth.
Beware! It’s so easy to choose activities that celebrate Christmas in a general way, that fall into the trap of the secular symbols of Christmas. As a children’s ministry worker, you want to be different. You want your message to stand out in stark contrast to what the students are getting elsewhere. Choose crafts and other activities that present the biblical message in a strong and compelling way.
Recently, I’ve been looking for a craft that emphasizes the Nativity. I found some great possibilities on the Internet. Check out these websites for Nativity craft projects for kids.
www.daniellesplace.com (a great website for all kinds of bible crafts)
www.teacherhelp.org
www.christiancrafters.com
www.dltk-holidays.com (A wonderful felt board nativity set here. I think I will use this activity for my group.)
www.familyfun.com (This is a secular site but I often find ideas here that I can adapt for my bible lessons.)
Next week, I’ll share some service projects for kids to do at Christmas.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Sharing Your Salvation
Before reading his Communion meditation last Sunday, one of the elders in my congregation asked us to bow our heads and thank God for the people who brought us to Christ.
Initially, I thought of Mary Anderson, the preacher’s wife at our small congregation in Arizona. At church camp for the first time, I was miserably homesick and woke up several mornings with tummyaches. One morning, when she came to check on me, I talked to her about accepting Jesus and asked some final defining questions that clified what I needed to do. She led me through the next step and I accepted Christ and was baptized the Sunday after I returned home.
Looking back, I realized Mary was only one of many people who led me to the foot of the cross. She didn’t tell me that much that day. She was merely the last one in a long chain of wonderful people who taght and exemplified what the Christian life was all about. There was her husband, Carl, who preached solid Biblical sermons. There were my wonderful Sunday teachers, Mrs. Conner, Mrs. Keeling, Mary, Mrs. Hemphill. There was my mother who faithfully took to us to Sunday School and church in spite of the fact my step-father didn’t go. I watched her teach and lead and coordinate programs. I saw her reading her bible and other Christian books. I learned from all of these people, not merely what they taught but how they lived. So last Sunday, I bowed my head, and thanked God for the wonderful teachers I had had in my life who led me to saving knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Another insight hit me this week. How do we express our thanksgiving? Saying thank you is not enough. Throughout the Bible, men and women showed their appreciation for God’s gifts by giving a gift, by passing on the blessing. The unforgiving servant in Jesus’ parable was guilty not just for failing to forgive his fellow servant. He failed to forgive in light of being forgiven so much himself. He had received the gift of mercy. He was not willing to pass even a tiny portion of the gift to someone else.
I have so gloriously received the gift of salvation. How can I say thanks to my Heavenly Father for such a great gift? By passing on the gift to the next person. How can I say thank you to my Lord for providing such dedicated teachers who had such tremendous influence on me? To give the gift of Bible knowledge to the children I teach.
David, broken and repentant after his sin with Bathsheba, pled for God’s mercy in the poignant Psalm 51. After asking for God’s forgiveness, he promised, “Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will turn back to you. – Psalm 51:13)
To whom can you pass the torch of God’s saving grace this Thanksgiving. You show your thankfulness to the Lord for your salvation by teaching the children you serve. This Sunday, let your teaching become your spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1).
Initially, I thought of Mary Anderson, the preacher’s wife at our small congregation in Arizona. At church camp for the first time, I was miserably homesick and woke up several mornings with tummyaches. One morning, when she came to check on me, I talked to her about accepting Jesus and asked some final defining questions that clified what I needed to do. She led me through the next step and I accepted Christ and was baptized the Sunday after I returned home.
Looking back, I realized Mary was only one of many people who led me to the foot of the cross. She didn’t tell me that much that day. She was merely the last one in a long chain of wonderful people who taght and exemplified what the Christian life was all about. There was her husband, Carl, who preached solid Biblical sermons. There were my wonderful Sunday teachers, Mrs. Conner, Mrs. Keeling, Mary, Mrs. Hemphill. There was my mother who faithfully took to us to Sunday School and church in spite of the fact my step-father didn’t go. I watched her teach and lead and coordinate programs. I saw her reading her bible and other Christian books. I learned from all of these people, not merely what they taught but how they lived. So last Sunday, I bowed my head, and thanked God for the wonderful teachers I had had in my life who led me to saving knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Another insight hit me this week. How do we express our thanksgiving? Saying thank you is not enough. Throughout the Bible, men and women showed their appreciation for God’s gifts by giving a gift, by passing on the blessing. The unforgiving servant in Jesus’ parable was guilty not just for failing to forgive his fellow servant. He failed to forgive in light of being forgiven so much himself. He had received the gift of mercy. He was not willing to pass even a tiny portion of the gift to someone else.
I have so gloriously received the gift of salvation. How can I say thanks to my Heavenly Father for such a great gift? By passing on the gift to the next person. How can I say thank you to my Lord for providing such dedicated teachers who had such tremendous influence on me? To give the gift of Bible knowledge to the children I teach.
David, broken and repentant after his sin with Bathsheba, pled for God’s mercy in the poignant Psalm 51. After asking for God’s forgiveness, he promised, “Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will turn back to you. – Psalm 51:13)
To whom can you pass the torch of God’s saving grace this Thanksgiving. You show your thankfulness to the Lord for your salvation by teaching the children you serve. This Sunday, let your teaching become your spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1).
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